Talking With Your Body Part 3

Ok in my last few posts i have talked about, the basics of body language and how to hold your self, how to look more attractive, and how to see if the opposite sex are attracted to you and if you should approach!

Well in this installment we are going to look into building confidence within you and looking confident on the outside, because as much as people deny it the two are related!

Ok so how to we go from a Shy Guy to a confident guy???

Well were going to start with YOU, yes that's right you. The reason i believe we are shy or afraid of speaking with beautiful women is one of two things. We either do think we can offer these girls anything, the old saying " what will she want with me?" comes to mind. Man i've used that to death. And the other reason is we are afraid  of what people with think of us if or when we get rejected by these beautiful women!

But what both of these reasons equates to is fear of REJECTION! Now i know i harp on about this bad boy all the time but hey, this is the one and only reason that Shy Guys fail with women.

However this is a good thing! Yes i say good thing! It is far easier to learn how become more confident then be over confident, cocky and arrogant!

Ok so were afraid of rejection, well step one is to think about this very scenario for a second. Ok lets say you go over to a really hot girl, and you say hey my names James, can i buy you a drink? She says now but you can leave now! and her friends giggle. What you have to realize that this isn't you with bad game this is you running into a complete BITCH and even the best pick up artists would have to pull out there best moves to defrost this ice queen!

Get over it, so what if she blows you off, so what if she snubs you, so what, so what, so what? Your still alive, you can still walk, you can go and speak to another women. And you still live in the knowledge that your a decent human being. The fact that she blew you off could have been hundreds of different things. Like she's had a bad day at work, 3 ass holes could have tried picking her up just before you went over and she just wants to be left alone. It's not always you dude!

Ok, first thing i want you to do is, practice walking with your shoulders back, with chest out and head up! While doing this think of a comedy sketch that just cracks you up every time!  This is to help show you feel good and puts a smile on your face. A smile will increase your attraction by 100% compared to not smiling! So smile be happy, lifes good!

Now when we walk, we walk slower. Take in your surroundings! Confident guys don't rush, their in control, they take their time, the world works to help them! So take your time. One great tip i can give you as well is if you walk into somewhere like a bar or shop, look the girls in the eyes for a few seconds and then move onto the next girl, as we discussed last time the importance of eye contact is immeasurable. Have you ever wanted to be that guy that walks into the bar and all the groups of girls start talking about you, this is a little way to begin to create that "who's that guy" moment and boy what a confidence booster that is.

Ok that will do for this post as i want you to go and practice the above. As usual any issues you wana chat about contact me @ mrshyguyblog@gmai.com

Untill next time
Dillinger

Talking with your body - Part 2

Hey Guys,

Hope you have taken in what we discussed last time, about eye contact, smiling, holding yourself correctly and noticing her body language and beginning to read it!

This will inevitably help you improve your confidence as you will know she wants you to come over a flirt with her!!!


In this post we will be going into more detail on specifics of body language:

Ok now if your reading this then you were once like me "Mr Shy Guy", you see a really cute girl and you really, really want to go and chat with her. Unfortunately the fear kicks in and totally immobilizes you and you basically just freeze! I know i've been there and it's the worst thing ever, because all you can say to your self is if only i could speak with her, if only!

But what were all really afraid of and what that fear we feel is REJECTION. Were afraid that if we go over and speak with a beautiful women, that we wont even register on her radar and she will just snub us!

Now i know not many if any of you have experienced this because, your afraid to go and find out, and hey it's not a problem 75% of men say they are scared of a women rejecting them.

What I am going to teach you in this and the next few posts is the basics of Body Language - How attract that beauty in the corner with your body!!!!

Ok so let set up the useful scene. Your in a bar and you turn round and notice this gorgeous women by the bar. You want to go and talk to her but you freeze, you get the fear of rejection ect, ect.

So how to we get rid of this fear!!!!

Well what we need to do is establish if the girl is interested in us first.

So we need create attraction with our body!!!

Firstly we need you to relax because i know what you do you see the girl start thinking about approaching her and tense up, as i have said in  my last post women are like poker players, now wait amazing poker players they are far better at reading body language then we can even imagine. So if your nervous, scared and tense this will show through your subconscious body language.

First take a DEEP breath, hold it in (don't suffocate) then exhale. repeat this 3 times this will release the tension in your shoulders and your chest! 

Ok now start moving, walk around a little wiggle your fingers, and laugh! Think of something that cracks you up, maybe your favorite comic has a gag that just kills you every time you here it. Think of that and laugh.  When we laugh we dissipate any tension or unease we have in our body and also,it's been proven that a person smiling looks 85% more attractive than if your not. I think this is because we want to be around happy people and people that are going to make us happy! makes sense really!

Ok so how can we tell if she's interested?

Well first we need to make eye contact, this is the crucial first step. Look over at her catch her eyes and hold her gaze for about 4 seconds, look away for 4 seconds and then look back at her for 4 seconds.

If she is interested and likes the look of you she may do a number of things, the obvious is smile at you! If she smiles make sure she shows her teeth as when we are genuinely and excited we show our teeth when we smile. Also she may flick her hair or twirl her hair around her finger this is the look at me i'm playing coy move, she is trying to so she is available! Another sign is for the women to move her hiar to one side of her neck exposing her neck which is a erogenous zone and shows
vulnerability!!! A classic is for her to start to run her fingers across her chest or hold her hand on her chest.

What we need to remember with body language is not to take each of the above signal in isolation as they may just be habits she has. You need to look for a group of movements, such as when you  look at her for the second time she may begin twirling her hair, smile and run her fingers across her chest.

If you see these signs smile back and see if her she smiles or carries on smiling. If so then you in!!!!!!

In my next post i will be exposing some more tell, tell signs she LIKES YOU and how to improve your chances with her using your body!!

Untill next time!!

Remember all you have to fear is fear it's self!!!

Talking with your body - Part 1

Hi, sorry for the long wait since the last post but I have been doing a lot of research, so i can begin to add a lot more quality to my posts.

What have I been up to?

Well i have been doing a lot of research on psychology, and more importantly the psychology of both the male and female mind. In order to find out what makes some guys more able to pull girls?

This post is going to focus on body language and the way we conduct our selves when in the company of a girl we like.

Along with my research i have been talking with women as well. Recently i spoke with a few of my sisters friends who gave me a big in site into the female mind!!!

I initially asked them "so what would be the best way for a man to approach you"?

The reply was both interesting, yet very surprising. They said that they can tell a mile off what a guy is thinking by his body language and the way he holds himself. After doing a little research into this i have found out that women can read body language 50% better then us men. Fact women love body language!

So with this i mind i delved further into the question what would be the best way to approach a women? The girls said that it normally starts with eye contact. You notice somebody, noticing you and take if from there. I asked what could a man do with this eye contact that would make him more attractive to you? The answer was keep eye contact, this is a must. Once you see her looking at you lock into her stare, smile and slightly squint and i mean slightly dont make it look like you have something in your eye lol. And do not look away until she does.

Ok so we have now established that you are interested in her, what we need to do now is see if she gives you any signals to invite you over. Apparently one of the classics if shes at the bar is to turn her back to you and rest on the bar, as she wants you to approach her and stand next to her. Another more subtle one is to run her fingers through her hair or tuck it behind her ear.

The next question i asked the girls keeping in mind women love body language was, " ok so just by looking at a man what would be something that would make him attractive"? The answer that came from almost every girl was "confidence", this single factor is what 99.9% of women feel they need to see when they look at a man to find him attractive. What we need to remember is that psychologically both men and women are still if the pre-historic thought pattern that men go out and hunt and women stay at home, cook and clean. So a strong confident man really appeals to women.

Ok so how do we look confident? Well several things can be done to achieve this. Firstly always walk with your shoulders back and your back straight and smile, yes that's right smile. Smiling is one of the most attractive things that you can do. It shows, your happy, your enjoying your self and the truth is that people want to be around happy people! Ok next thing to make our selves look more attractive is chill out and slow down, this dynamically improves your attractiveness, just look at guys like Steve Mcqueen, James Bond, Will smith, Brad Pitt. The word COOL comes to mind and slowing down everything like your walk, your hand gestures, how you grab your drink, put it to you lips and drink it and then put it down will inevitably make you look cooler. At first your will have to consciously think about this but eventually it will become second nature.

Well i hope that has given you enough to think about, and try out.

Things to try out

Eye contact - Just try holding eye contact with a girl and see if you can hold it until she looks away first!

Slowing down - Try slowing your walk down, your hand gestures and small things like drinking your drink. ( don't over kill this and look like your in slowmo though lol - be sensible maybe add a few seconds onto drinking your drink)

Smiling - Studies have shown that people that smile, look more attractive, attract more women and generally feel better about themselves.

Give them ago and let me know how you get on!

Until next time 

Dillinger

A friendly word

I’ve been speaking to one of my friends Craig who is a bit of a hit with the ladies he seems to have no trouble at all getting really attractive and interesting girls. I have often wandered what was his secret? So I final sat him down yesterday and asked him, ok so what’s the score?

Craig said that he has a set plan for chatting to girls and it has a 90% success rate. I asked him to elaborate and this is what he had to say.

“ When I see a girl I like I try to establish eye contact with her. While making eye contact pick out something of her that really attracts you to her. It could be her smile, eyes, her outfit, but pick something. Getting back to the eye contact, if she is interested she will hold eye contact for about 3 seconds and then look away, on the third time of making eye contact with her. I get up (still keeping eye contact) and walk over to her, now remember what you picked out that you liked about her? Lets pick her eyes for the sack of this talk. When you get over to her, the FIRST thing you say BEFORE you mention whom you are is compliment her on her eyes, dress, outfit excreta, something like. I just wanted to come over and tell you that your eyes are beautiful. She will normally say thank you very much, then this is the crucial part, ( walk right past her to a friend, the toilet any where) give it ten minutes and then come back into her eye line and get eye contact again.

Now you can approach with ease as you have broken the ice. This time say something along the lines of, Hi my names _____ would you like to join me and my friends or Hello I’m _______ what do you think of the DJ? Something just to get the conversation started”.

Straight from the horses mouth!

Hey hop your all well!

I was speaking with a friend of mine today and we got onto the topic of chatting people up. I asked her do men normally appear sleazy or rude when they approach you, as this is one of the major hang ups I have is looking sleazy when approaching girls. She said some do but the majority of me have enough decorum to come across at worst pleasant.

This was a revelation for me as I always thought that I would come across like a dirty old man if I didn’t get it right when chatting to a girl. She advised that the best thing a man can do when he talks to a girl is listen, that’s why we have two ears and one mouth apparently! She said there is nothing more frustrating than a man that comes over filled with his own self importance and spends the next hour telling you all about me, me, me!

She said her three top tips when talking to a woman are:

1)    Eye contact (a must)

2)    Listen to what the girl is actually saying and not what you think she is saying!

3)    Smile; show the girl your fun to be with!

Well that has certainly given me something to consider, although I’m sure I have tried all the above but maybe not all at the same time.

Anyway guys give it a go and feel free to let me know how it goes, as I will you. So go on feel the fear and do it anyway!

Help is at hand I think????

For many years now I have found it very hard, well I said hard I mean impossible to approach women and chat to them. Weather it be in a club, bar, restaurant or even a work colleague. The fear is incredible, I mean I will see a girl in a bar she will give me all the right signals but still I have this fear of approaching her. Why?

Well it's a common psychological problem for about 75% of men and that's lack of confidence or an inferiority complex. I consider my self to be a good looking guy, a lot of my sisters friends think I'm good looking. So why do I still have a problem?

I think think most men are like me, well 75% anyway. I look at a girl, I think ok she's gorgeous, sexy, classy, her friends says she's really intelligent, she everything I could ask for in a women, but the inevitable question comes along! What will she see in me?

This is our major mistake, we are instantly putting our minds into a negative mind frame, and thus even if we did muster up the courage to approach the beauty in the corner, our body language, speech and general attitude isn't very attractive.

A little experiment I tried that had better results, was to imagine the girl smiling, and being delighted you have come over to speak to her. Lets face it guy's why do girls spend hours getting ready, putting on make-up, sorting their hair and slipping into that little black number it is so guy's yes us, will go and chat to them. So go on imagine the girl, wanting you to go and chat to them, because as we have found out. They do!